I get a trillion emails a second and most of them say similar stuff. Don't get me wrong, I love to read your views, but there are a bunch of questions and statements that pop up a lot. Here's a slag bag of frequently asked questions, that I have answered to save us all some time.

"How do you come up with your ideas?"

Every morning I find them under my fingernails. In other words, I can't answer that question.

"Will there be any more Salad Fingers / Jerry Jackson / Spoilsbury Toast Boy/ Burnt Face Man etc.? "

Yes there will. None of these series have officially ended. There will always be more. If I decide to end a series I will tell you.

"What are you currently working on? "

I start a lot of projects. I don't finish everything I start. I would post a list of all the things I am working on, but every day I would have to change it. To make things easier just follow me on twitter. I know it's a bit of a silly fad for self obsessed egos, but if you really would like to know, then follow me as I update it whenever I feel I have anything of interest to report.

"Do you purposely try to upset people?"

I just do what I do and people react how they react. If I actually wanted to upset people I could think of much more effective ways than some harmless internet cartoons. Some people need to stop taking life so seriously.

"Can I interview you?"

Maybe. I will usually accept interviews for podcasts, radio shows, websites and magazines. If you are serious about interviewing me then get in touch and be sure to provide any links and info as to where the interview will be published.

"Your T-shirts are priced in Dollars, can I buy them if I live in [insert country] ?"

You can buy T-shirts whatever country you live in, we ship all over the world. They are priced in Dollars because the company that prints them (Cafepress) are based in the USA. If you have a credit card you can buy them from what ever currency you use, and because the Dollar is so weak at the moment, it'll cost you less.

Take a look at the exchange rate here

"Do you use a graphics tablet to draw your animations?"

Yes. Everything since 2006 has been drawn using a Wacom Intuos3 a4 graphics tablet. My graphics tablet has actually completely replaced my mouse and is what I use for doing everything.

"Are you going to ever make a Salad Fingers Movie?"

There already is one. Keanu Reeves plays Salad Fingers and Dustin Hoffman plays Hubert Cumberdale. Its one of those films that's got a really strong blue/green filter on the lens all the time and is mainly filmed in underground car parks.


Salad Fingers: Keanu Reeves

Hubert Cumberdale: Dustin Hoffman

Jeremy Fisher: Ice Cube

Marjory Stewart Baxter: Avril Lavigne

The Little Yellow Kid: Sting

"Can I link to your page from mine? "

Sure you can! Links are always welcome. If you'd like a banner then there are loads here

"Can you email me when you make a new cartoon/do another episode?"

Here are three fun ways you can keep up to date with fat-pie: Subscribe to the RSS feed, follow fatpie on twitter and Join the mailing list.

"How can I make my own music?"

Get a guitar/piano/sax/bassoon. If you want to record it get Adobe Audition, Acid Pro or Cubase. If you want to sequence beats and synths then get Reason or Fruityloops. If you think this is kid's stuff and you know of advanced software that real pros use, then you obviously don't need my help. Remember, the microphone input on your pc is a bag of shit.....use the line in with a pre amp or some variety of audio console.

"What music is used in your cartoons?"

It's usually on the Music Used page but I'm a slack bugger when it comes to updating that page. A swift email in my direction should sort that out.

"Is that Devvo guy real? "

Yes! He's absolutely genuine. His stories are probably lies and exaggerations though

"It's my friend's birthday, can you make them an episode of Salad Fingers/Burnt Face Man.....?"

No. It takes me a long time to make cartoons.

".....I'm prepared to pay you"

It'll cost you £50,000.

"Can you use my music in your cartoons? "

Possibly, Send me some and I might just use it. You'll get credited of course. The music for Video dating Tape was submitted by an unsigned artist called Sebastian Svanh, and the Burnt Face Man music was composed especially by Datach'i. I'm always on the look out for more ambient/moody/creepy/strange music so email it to me or send me a website link. *Update* I still want you to send me your music, but don't just send the tracks to my email, upload them somewhere and send me the links as my gmail is dangerously close to being full. Yousendit, filefront, rapidshare and megaupload are my suggestions.

"Can I help you write future episodes?"

No thanks. I have plenty of ideas. If you think you have some really good ideas, but can't animate I would suggest (a) try learning to animate - it takes a lot of practice but can be very rewarding. Or (b) go to the newgrounds forums and see if any animators would like to team up with you. Or (c) find some other creative way of getting your ideas across.

"You're a sell out because you had stuff on TV / a corporate website "

You think it paid well? HAH!

That's all for now folks. Now you know the answers to these important questions, you can send me something interesting, send me your wisdom and hatred: [email protected]

Don't send me stuff I have to pay for though. Adverts have no place in my inbox